Christ lives in me

A testimony from one of "Our Girls on the Inside": Beatrice

My name is Beatrice, I am a believer in Jesus Christ in recovery and I battle with anger, sadness and doubt.

Before my recovery I had a lot of resentment towards my family because I was rejected due to my disability.  My self-esteem was low because I did not received love or protection and didn’t understand why God made me this way.

I married a man who loved and treated me good; he even let me go to church.  I didn’t know God and was easily dominated by the things of this world and that is why I failed.  Not only did I fail God but also my husband as I had an affair. The lowest point in my life was when I neglected my daughter to the point that she died. Her death is the reason I am in prison.

Today although it doesn’t make sense I thank God for being here because I have been able to really get to know Him. I was invited to the Celebrate Recovery Program and I realized I wasn’t the only one suffering, I identified with all the participating inmates.  I have been able to forgive and the communication with my family has gotten better.  I have learned to trust and know God, I know He loves me and I am important to Him.  Principle 2 says “Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.”

I thank God for the Celebrate Recovery Program because my heart is being restored little by little.  I thank God for my group and the sisters from YUGO because they come with lots of love not only to share the lesson but because they strive to provide us with our basic needs.

Thank you for letting me share.